so i'm a little slow

when it comes to new year resolutions but it's been a busy january. in a happy place and it wasn't even something that had crossed my mind, until the mister pointed out, "why won't you be content at this stage?" that's when i realised i had been whinging about wishing i'd done medicine as an undergrad. funny how it's still something i semi-regret i.e. not being brave enough to bite the bullet earlier. immensely grateful for a first degree, even more grateful that studying for said degree is where i met the mister. and i try to convince myself that i've a little extra emotional maturity doing medicine as a graduate, and how if i'd gone into it at 18, i'd be a very boring, one-dimensional medical robot. but how much of that is self-assuaging, and how much is true is an area i try not to spend too much time in. 

one of the first things that turned me on about graduate medicine is when i was visiting L, my dear canadian cousin, in dublin. it was summer 08 and the mister was in leuven sitting the last of his exchange exams. so as not to be in his way, i hopped over to visit L. turned out i'd picked a good time because some of her friends were converging in dublin the same week. they were all in their mid-20s, with illustrious first degrees under their belts and a wealth of life experience. as graduate medics, they were some of the more articulate and interesting people i've had the privilege of meeting. they'd already accomplished so much before their 30s, and were embarking on a medical career because that's how it is stateside and in canada. i started to see graduate medicine as a viable option and was inspired by this dynamic bunch who i was certain would go on to be amazing doctors (and have!). 

so yes, this year i want to be even more conscious of and actively practice a sense of gratitude when it comes to still being in school. a primary school teacher just got in touch over facebook recently and asked quite incredulously, "how come you're still studying?!" and she's right. much as i'm in a hurry to start working (having worked once before, i miss being self-sufficient) i'm trying to see this as bonus time of being responsibility-free, of delaying adulthood just a few years more. and i tell myself it could be so much worse if the mister hadn't signed me up for medsch entrance exams, and pushed me to apply when the conformist in me just wanted to get married and pop out babies (HAHA, how i've changed!) 

on a completely unrelated note, i've also grown disenchanted with facebook. it's nothing new but maybe being in the UK is getting to me. there's an unspoken emphasis on being understated and rubbing holiday photos in 2000+ fb friends faces is as far from understatement as it gets. a friend posted this a couple of weeks ago and it struck a chord. in a nutshell, the author says to consider five things before posting to social media i.e.

 

1. am i seeking approval?

2. am i being boastful?

3. am i discontent?

4. is this a moment to protect?

5. is it kind?

was relieved to recognise but not identify with 1. 3. and 5, but 4. did get to me. ask the mister and i'm definitely guilty of snapping away instead of truly immersing myself and enjoying the moment for what it is. well, that's an aside to the omnipresent iPhone, but i do think moments can be captured but not all moments need to be shared. as i get older, i find myself getting increasingly protective of moments with the mister. photos that capture certain times and milestones are not necessarily moments i feel like broadcasting online. of course, there's always our reserve of photos of family and friends, the good stuff that you want to keep to yourself, but the bar for posting seems to be slowly raising by the day. i think friendship and closeness has to be earned (horrible friend alert!) and likewise there are fewer people i want seeing our holiday photos. there are also hordes of people out there who probably can't care less about our christmas break and don't want us popping up on their newsfeed. just over christmas, my cousin wrote to say our life on fb is 'annoyingly awesome'. and that's him being kind! which brings me on to 3. while never intended, the effect of posting photos is boastful! it's all "look at me and my amazing life" so i took a step back, put on a pair of discontented glasses and started examining what was popping up on my newsfeed and ooh it was easy to start hating.

social media is a personal choice and there's always an element of facebrag, whether you want to admit it or not. not going to go all militant and stop posting all together, but fb is becoming less attractive a platform to stay in touch with friends. it's a good place to find rivetting (and other times rubbishy!) articles, but i'm less inclined to share content of my own.

and in a roundabout way, maybe that's why i like this blog because i can put photos in context in a way you can't always on fb. also, while you can't really control what crops up on a fb newsfeed, you've to make an active decision to read a blog. so if you're going to pop by, you're more than welcome and if you can't be bothered, no loss.

photo from our recent weekend in belfast, and a short travelogue to follow!