leisurely lunches

it's some time since i've cooked for friends. had family in town a couple of weeks ago and keeping them fed and watered was a great endeavour. flattered they prefer what i prepare over the gastronomical delights that abound in london (haha) and spent more time in the kitchen the week they were around than i had in months. but all good and i'm a natural feeder so it was satisfying and gratifying to ply them with home-made goodness. a dear friend was also in london and i've been wanting to have her over for ages! we'd already met up a couple of times during her trip, and for some great meals, and she was craving something home-cooked and veggie heavy. the beauty of london living and seasonal produce is, well, seasonal produce. i love the colours and summer flavour and texture of peppers. sweet potato strikes me as more autumnal but what the hey. tandoori chicken for good measure (hey, i love chicken!) and steamed salmon for a more healthy option. of course we washed everything with choya, courtesy of P who came round for dinner the night before (i'm on a roll!) so it wasn't all that healthy but hey, have to live a little. 

what i liked about this combination of dishes was how the veg and chicken were in the oven at the same temperature for the same time, easy peasy! and the salmon needed 10min in the steamer. so pretty much fuss free, and easy to time to their arrival. and after lunch we sort of sat around in food coma, having coffee, mango & peaches, and more choya. W is the genius behind my cornflower wedding bouquet and we'd such fun reminiscing about the wedding. self-indulgent as it may seem, three years have flown by and we were laughing about the advice Z, her husband, gave me the night before the wedding. it was 1am but the sun showed no sign of setting (incidentally, it was midsummer and his birthday!) and i was asking if i should write my own vows. to which everyone laughed and was, like, "seriously?! now?! 8h before the fat lady sings?" so i didn't. and he asked me if he'd been right, and he was. because really, you don't know what it's going to be like, or what promises one needs to make. it was a good night! the wedding party (basically 20 of us minus the >32s) were sitting in the banquet hall pigging out on pizza and kebabs lovingly carted over from the closest takeaway, incidentally an hour's drive away in the next next next town. we tried to get my sister drunk on whiskey coke, and then we went for a walk in the long grass to look for elves as the midnight sun shone on us. my dear bridesmaids couldn't find a male stripper (uh, the closest pizza was one hour away, what more strippers!) so my bachelorette's was perfect i.e. the whole wedding party (including groom) on a midnight walk as the babyfaced hotel intern told us stories about the hotel and environs. 

(photo credits to rui)

isabella

had important guests in town who wanted to visit isabella plantation for sentimental reasons. apparently it was there that they were held up for over an hour while i napped at 14 months old. such love, not wanting to wake the sleeping child. little wonder i'm still bad (good?) about sleep and am nothing but grumpy when roused. they were hankering for flowercam (is there such a thing?) to see the condition of the flowers before going to the plantation. sort of like the live cams trained on ski slopes so one can see skiing conditions. didn't have the heart to tell them that the best time was mid-may, and in fact met someone at dinner the night before who'd gone three weeks ago and saw the flowers at their prime. so we were a few weeks late (or 11 months early) and the rhodies were half strewn on the floor. but on the plus side the plantation was empty and we'd it all to ourselves. 

felt like such a responsible adult, mind. had them round for super early home-cooked dinner on friday, put them to bed, then went to C's new sloane square nest (baby due any week now!) for a sophisticated italian dinner. what's it about the italians who do everything better?! the yummiest bruschetta to start (fresh, sweet tomatoes and basil, creamy tuna with capers, avo with feta) a mountain of the best ham (lovingly hand carried back from her last trip to milan before baby) and the most gorgeous main of rigatoni sicilian-style. washed everything down with a sublime brunello and had ice cream at the end. felt so grown up and stayed till about one before responsibly going home and straight to bed, up bright and early for the isabella plantation jaunt. and as all good richmond visits include a petersham pilgrimage, after our fill of flowers we had coffee and scones at petersham nursery before crawling through the city (darn you, london traffic!) for japanese lunch.

go ape!

while i don't make a point of setting about new year resolutions (bound to break them before day 1) i do try to find a theme for the year. often it's along the lines of 'be unflappable'. or 'try new things' (cliche) and better yet, 'overcome fear'. little did i know that go ape would sort of tick all three boxes. oh, as an aside, i'm trying to be more mindful this year and to multitask less. like less mindless eating (bad habit of stuffing my face with crisps and cake while watching netflix) and more home-cooking and taking the time to savour my food. go ape came about after i last hung out with A and R (who incidentally i'm eternally grateful to for introducing me to A!) and realised how much i liked being with them. and R suggested i join them for a day of organised fun in cambridge. didn't need to be asked twice! also, i really like camby and hadn't been since Y's graduation easter 2012 so was long over due for a visit. 

probably my fault for not doing due diligence. R made it sound so easy, casually climbing trees in cambridge, yeah i could do that. and A was quick to sweeten the deal with the promise of waffles before we set off climbing. IT WAS HARD and there were points where i was literally screaming. A's got all of it on video that i hope will never see the light of day. what was meant to be a 90min activity ended up taking closer to four hours, although as budgetking R said, we really got our money's worth. also, i hadn't realised it wouldn't actually be in cambridge but tetford. but never fear, there was space in the car for one more and A & R's friends were kind to let me hitch a ride.

at the end of it all i.e. after we were very embarrassingly asked to let the stag group of twelve overtake cos we were just too slow, we made a pit stop at maccas on the way back to camby (yay to 20pc mcnuggets and apple pies!) before having dinner at the smokehouse. now i've been to many smokehouses but this was one of the best. the southern fried chicken was so juicy, even the white meat wasn't dry! and the ribs perfect. drooling just thinking about it and would actually make the over hour long commute to cambridge just for a meal there.

lions and tigers

photo credits to the papa-razzi, whose camera and skillz makes me not bother with my own. also, don't you wonder about these stately homes? like what if one doesn't want to be a marquis but it's a birthright that's forced upon oneself? what if one preferred anonymity, and say, being a plumber instead of the local aristo? then what happens? joke that these homes are so expensive to maintain that they often need to attract and be open to public (hence 'lions and tigers') to stay afloat. but the grounds are beautiful, period furniture to die for. been thinking about heritage and legacy lately, especially when V was talking about going into practice with the aim of taking over his father's firm. there's something noble about that, about shelving personal ambition to do what's expected, to be dutiful in a sense. yet couldn't help but wonder if that would be the best use of his talent and skill. it's a happy position to be in, how many people have a family business to take over? and it's a champagne problem, to say the least. but hear me out, what if the path one wants to follow isn't the tried and tested one? what if there's no precedent? does one carve their own or take up the mantle placed on them with a heavy heart. life's too sort to please other people, even if they're family.

it's been a good few days of quietness and contemplation, some much needed peace from the hustle bustle that is summer in london. have tried my best to opt out, to say no, to be protective of time and down time. enjoying pottering around the flat, tidying, kicking back and reading to my heart's content. appreciate it's for a season, these lovely long empty days will not be forever, and to slow down and be mindful, finding joy in the mundane.

greenwich

the brief was, well, brief. "book nice lunch outside london", she said. we'd done petersham nursery the last time and it was hard to top. chanced upon the telegraph in putney and had considered that but felt it a tiny cop out as it wasn't really "outside london" (then again, what would they've known!) so greenwich it was. passed it on the thames boatride a few weeks ago, and had heard good things from C, an italian friend who'd visited with her husband. also, seemed silly to have been based in london for four years and not ventured that way yet. had a pub lunch then made the most of being in a new place (haha, so desperate for new adventures) and spent the afternoon mosey-ing around. lovely views from the observatory, the maritime museum was cute, as was cutty sark, gelato from black vanilla and greenwich market looked suspiciously like the wannabe ethnic market at brick lane. sort of formulaic stall mix but if you're not discerning it's not half bad.

holding space

appreciate this is a relatively frivolous blog with happy clappy posts about london living, but it's a poor reflection of life in its technicolour glory. it's been a funny year with lots of sad news. thankful nothing too close to home, but it's been close to heart. and being thousands of miles away from our near and dear does render one helpless. embarrassingly, i've the florist on speed dial and have sent more 'cheer up' bouquets than celebratory ones of late. because, short of jumping on the next plane to singers, there's really nothing else to do. of course there's whatsapp and the other wonders of technology, but the last thing i'd want to do is impose on friends already going through a rough time. think people need space and should be allowed to engage on their terms, when they're ready. and whatsapp is brilliant for that. was reading this great article about holding space and it really resonated. 

without going into too much detail, and wanting to protect our friends' privacy, there have been some major losses (health, parents' health, marriage, parents, unborn babies, babies never conceived, jobs) and i've learnt how it's occasionally more kind not to ask after things because there's probably nothing more annoying than someone constantly badgering them. no one wants to be a curiosity, no one wants to constantly explain that they've still not conceived, or that they have but are cautiously optimistic this time round and aren't ready to talk about it yet. 

spent an entire day with a friend recently who shared she was in the process of trying to become a single mother this year. but she didn't bring it up when we next met (maybe there was nothing left to say?) and i didn't dare ask in case it wasn't going well. there's something very azn (sorry, hate to generalise) about people asking you to eat , sleep , not work so hard (or work harder). and people projecting their idiosyncracies onto you. it's kind of naggy and incredibly off-putting and i need to consciously stop myself every time i find myself lapsing into auntie-mode. no doubt well-meant but surely there's a better way to express concern. 

so how does one go about supporting friends experiencing tough times? i'm still figuring that out and if you've a better idea, please tell me! after all, it's so individual and in a way harping on the issue (cancer / miscarriage / unemployment) isn't productive. i tend to do a general check-in, share my own challenges and let them guide the conversation i.e. we'll only talk about the issue if they bring it up first because maybe all they want is a break from the noise surrounding whatever it is they're facing. not saying to forget and most definitely not being dismissive of the massive emotional (and/or physical) trauma they've been through but time and place, really.

london parks

one of my favourite things to do in london is walking in her many parks. i'm a little slow on the london is wonderful bandwagon. there are many things i dislike about the place but aim to remain grateful for the chance to live here while we do. it's easy to find fault, to be hypercritical (singapore training take some time un-learning) so i consciously slow down and take it all in. learning to be more chilled out when things don't work instead of having a fit and boycotting transport for london. the parks are great and i'm taking the time to discover them one by one, and then re-visit them in different weather, with different friends. 

that's another thing about being based in london and having a steady stream of guests. used to be better about it but now find myself saying no more often. it's tricky balancing a full day of work, with longer hours than most, and playing happy host to the hordes. had this discussion with F who lamented that friends in town just want to eat out, and why not, because they're on holiday. however i've neither the time nor limitless resources to eat out because i'm not on holiday, actually have things to do, and can't be having heston*blumenthal every single night. it's hard to say no without coming across as mean. but if you think about it, we've a handful of friends in town every week, more if it's summer, which literally means meeting different people for dinner in the week and lunch AND dinner on the weekend. much as i'm a fan of hedonism, it gets all too much and social anxiety creeps in. 

so my coping mechanism is building down-time into the equation, walking along the river and having time out to process and decompress. it's working, so far :) and trying to do activities with friends (like more walking) instead of meals seems to be a viable alternative, too.

  thames near battersea

battersea pond

albert bridge

hyde park

regents park broadway

sand in my cone!

had to head north for talks and thought to make the most of its coast and sunshine. silly me hadn't factored in windchill (rookie mistake!) and was skipping along with my 99-er, determined to have it on the beach when these awful awful gusts of wind blew sand into my ice cream :( it was a crunchy cone. and because i was being vain and had my hair down, suddenly hair was whipping everywhere and it got into my ice cream and left sticky streaks across my face. i was a right mess and then my cone blew over. absolute disaster. was inconsolable and needed coffee and shelter from the wind after. not a roaring success, unfortunately. but the view was good. and i might've trespassed to take this photo of the chairs but they were too cute. also, you can't tell because the water looks deceptively calm BUT IT WAS WINDY. otherwise uneventful time in the city. 

super grateful to A for letting me stay and entertaining me after a long day of back-to-back theatre lists. she's such a star. we'd go for a late, leisurely dinner, take our time over pudding and coffee, get back to hers, stay up talking even more before she casually mentions she needs to do some reading (head&neck anat, for example) because there was a thyroid list the next day. by which time i'm looking at the clock in horror because it's past midnight and she's been so kind and indulgent and giving of her time AND SHE STILL HAS TO WORK BEFORE BED???

she's also a font of wisdom and dispenser of sound advice. when i'm off on a rampage being all anti-baby she reigns me in with gentle words. not many people are able to talk me off a ledge (bad jo) but she's one of the few who get me to see sense. it was a restorative time being with her and i'm ever thankful for good girlfriends.

bonus

was fortuitously signed off early during my last placement and had some time go to exploring! nothing better than guilt-free adventure during what would've been the work week. also, totes schadenfreude but everyone was working and too busy to hang out :) this sort of has to make up for the massive FOMO i'm feeling as everyone is posting elective photos with reckless abandon. hey! i want to be sipping rum in the caribbean too! but, alas, there are adult responsibilities to be dealt with, and i try to console myself with the prospect of the big sur road trip and some stolen time in phuket later this summer. also, psyched to be doing elective in singers at healthserve where i can finally doctorlawyer (this blog title does not lie!) to my heart's content. looking forward to medical and legal clinics and look ma, i'm a qualified lawyer! and can actually take on cases pro bono and fight for migrant worker rights. my not-so-secret messiah complex is well appeased. shameless self-promotion aside, i was thrilled to have some downtime to wander around my 'hood. would wake when i wanted (no alarm, woohoO!) slap on sunblock and just walk. lovely change from the early starts i'd gotten used to. found myself gravitating towards richmond park, and joke that it's faster to walk there than it was to get home on public transport (not crazy enough to hoof it both ways!). no delays, just good ol' under performing tfl.

it was also about this point that i learnt my cousin had just given birth! which made the walk and river view extra special :)

lots of deer!

can't go to richmond park without stopping at petersham nursery for coffee and window shopping.

gorgeous morning light, worth the 90min commute home.

PP

having done a placement at GOS, was well clued-in even before i started that peter*pan royalties have been bequeathed to the trust. so every bit of PP merch bought / sold contributes in some way. also have a strange fascination with j*m*barrie and enjoyed his earlier work like the little minister and a window in thrums. have a running joke with a friend about sir barrie himself, one that's not meant to be repeated in polite company, but do ask me when we next meet and i'll be happy to share! 

we try to go to regents park open air theatre every summer, and have yet to be disappointed by the quality productions. also been lucky not to have been rained on, with the london weather at her temperamental best! caught twelfth night and to kill a mockingbird last summer, and the sound of music the summer before. hoping to catch seven brides later this season but we'll see how that goes. 

so PP was a surprise! far from the feel good candyfloss disney-esque entertainment i'd expected. it was dark, twisted, and very cleverly used a great war military hospital as the conceit for telling the tale. flawless execution, although i missed the point of the scary singing woman who'd appear and flounce around during scene changes. maybe that was the point. it really got me thinking and it was fine-tuned with its nuance and layers. felt the themes of growing up and responsibility particularly poignantly conveyed, parenthood (motherhood?) and guidance, a coming of age of sorts all on the backdrop of the young men sent to the front of WWI. the pirates and modern day parallels (captain hook was the military captain, smee was the matron) were a joy to watch. such energy! it was a sad show, and left me with a sense of heaviness and gratitude. grateful to be living in this time of (relative) peace but alive to the fragility of such a situation. often joke that i identify with peter pan and not wanting to grow up  (oh hey, back to school for a second professional degree? sign me up!) and feeling in a state of perpetual arrested development. but also realise that final year is upon me (where did all that time go?!) and life as a doctor awaits. no complaints, this was the end point / start point and i'm excited about what lies in store. 

thoroughly enjoyable evening at the theatre and for the first time with the sibs and their delightful +1s. they've chosen well and i'm happy to see them happy and loved up :)

the flying elk

hands down my best meal of 2015! and we weren't even into june yet :) second best meal of 2015 was the hand&flower with the same friends. i'm sensing a pattern here... photo credits to the multi-talented and ever resourceful shawn chan, who really should just open a restaurant already. so there i was, the pseudo-local convinced that i knew the city like the back of my hand. conveniently forgetting that much would've changed since 2009, and that in 2009 i was on a student budget that stretched to lidl mystery meat that was pushing expiry. the food scene has really taken off since (actually, it could've always been elevated, just that i wasn't privy to any of it!) and trust S to score us the last table at the flying elk, just before their flight. unforch i was in foodie heaven and have since forgotten what any of the dishes were called. have a memory more for tastes, textures and smells than i have for constituent ingredients (sigh, can forget about ever attempting to replicate anything!) but food is meant to be transportative, isn't it? and this meal took me to cloud9.

street food

constantly grateful for foodie friends who're clued in to the best finds in each city. K, my cousin-in-law, visited my cousin C when she was in stockholm on exchange. he's not been back since but when i sent him the anthony bourdain kebab stand photo, he told me to get the tunnbrodsrulle without missing a beat. funny story there, the evening before i'd done something most geriatric and left F to nap back at the hotel. hadn't realised i'd pointed out said kebab stand before, and the sweet girl, bless her, brought back a kebab for my pre-dinner snack. now this was before i went crazy at koh phangan.

aside: was last at koh phangan with A and S and was well impressed by the authenticity of the thai food available in stockholm. shouldn't have been surprised, though, as there's a direct flight from bangkok to stockholm and many cross-cultural couples, lets just say ;) 

after kebab #1, i just had to go back for another. and got my wish the next day when i hatched a cunning plan to return. there was also stikkinikki gelato to head in the same direction for. nikki's was an institution by the water and when i was last there, it was summer 2010 and J and i were talking marriage and babies. in fact, when i told her we'd gotten engaged, she brought up our conversation and said something along the lines of, 'omg, everything's gone according to plan!" now it's not often that i've my ducks lined up in a row but that was one of the rare occasions where, yes, things did work out and i am more than grateful :) so you can imagine my horror when i went in search of nikki's but found it to be a generic shop! the hut was the same but it was selling, gasps, walls! thankfully the interwebs pointed me in the right direction there are now shops all over stockholm. oh the lofty peaks of gelato mountain, i mean it was a pint trying to squeeze into a tiny cup. much like me and skinny jeans after this trip.

the legendary tunnebrodsrulle - sausages, mash, shrimp cocktail. heart attack (or two) in a wrap. so. awesome.

and to my horror, my spirit sartorial twin is a swedish father of two. time to up my game...